"You're not listening to me." My daughter plaintively growled this at me in the grocery store yesterday. She was right. I wasn't listening. I often fail to listen which is exactly why I developed the Just 10 project. Listening doesn't come naturally to me. I have to work at it. I also have to work at being a good-enough mom.
This last week has been sprinkled with doubt in my parenting abilities. It was hard to find the energy to come up with new strategies. My children are still not good about following through. They get distracted easily. Their childhood is very different from what mine was. What I think should come naturally to them, does not. I have to teach them to be problem solvers and critical thinkers. I felt overwhelmed by the job ahead.
In this maelstrom of self-pity, I was thrown a lifeline. I had the good fortune to share some of my parenting woes with two women who are great moms. I don't think they really know or always believe that there are. These women are the moms of grown children and yet they keep utilizing their maternal skill sets on children who need good mothering. They gave me hope and ideas. They helped me remember that I'm in it for the long haul. Sometimes you just can't see results until much later. They helped me see the bigger picture.
Most importantly, the spaces between their wise words, told me that it's ok to be a good-enough mom. Perfection isn't attainable. You will make mistakes. Giving up is not an option. It's time to get back in the game. I'll keep trying and that will be good enough.
A special thanks to Kathy M. and Jeanne G. You inspire me.
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