Alchemy

The image above looks a bit like a rug you might find rolled up in the local Goodwill.  It's really an old Arabic symbol I found on a web site that talks of this mystical brass teapot supposedly formed on the day Jesus went before Pontius Pilate.  Since then it's passed through hands for centuries, kings, queens, Hitler maybe even Marilyn Monroe or Marilyn Manson.  It's a cross between The Holy Grail and Aladdin's lamp.  Here I thought the word "alchemy" meant turning the ordinary into gold.   I guess it can mean a lot more.

Yesterday as I sat mired in a "hell of my own making" cursing fate, government conspiracies, the misalignment of the stars, stepping on a sidewalk crack and just plain bad luck, I realized that I needed to become an alchemist and learn how to turn "crap into gold."  Pardon my use of a rather crude colloquial expression.  In this case, it does seem like the perfect word.   The word "alchemy" along with the phrase "turn crap into gold"  took up residence in my head and has been banging around up there ever since. 

During my morning shower, the word, "alchemy" really started rattling my mental doors and I knew I'd have to give this idea some Just 10 thought.  Normally, I try very hard to keep an optimistic overcoat (i.e. facade) wrapped tightly against the cold but the truth is, I often struggle against feeling bitter or dumped on by some capricious Fate.     Worst case scenario is an art form I have perfected.   Turning difficulties into advantages, well,that requires either divine intervention, a hard whack on the cranium or a whole lot of mental energy.  Some days I just don't feel up to the task.  In this vacuum of inertia,  the word "alchemy" is now filling the void.

Some days you just can't run from the truth.  As I rinsed my hair and mentally questioned the occasion of my last leg shaving, I realized that life is presenting me an amazing opportunity.   I can indulge the feeling of being the universe's punching bag, the long-suffering victim, the poor damaged soul,  or I can become an alchemist and turn "crap into gold."

I'd like to say that realizing this, in just these words, was a liberating breakthrough.   While I was encouraged by this "new" perspective, the truth is I am less than giddy with enthusiasm.  I have no illusions about the amount of inner and outer work this is going to take.  Just thinking about it makes me tired.    Fortunately, I'm smart enough to know that of the two options, I'd be an idiot not to take up "alchemy."  "Crap,  it's time for a make over."